CrossFit gives its workouts names. It’s a sign of respect, mostly. You might’ve heard of Murph, a ball-breaking workout named after Lieutenant Michael Murphy, a Navy SEAL killed in Operation Red Wings.
Murph
For time, wearing a 9 kg vest or body armour
- 1.6 km run
- 100 pull-ups
- 200 push-ups
- 300 air squats
- 1.6 km run
Meet the CrossFit Girls
Then there’s the Girls. Before CrossFit started naming workouts after the fallen, they named them after women. The CEO said the idea being the same as naming a hurricane: short name, small footprint, going to fuck up your life. A hurricane… Yeah, sure.
Anyway, Cindy is the entry-level Girl and she’s still a ball-breaker. Five pull-ups, ten push-ups, fifteen air squats, on a loop, for 20 minutes straight. No barbell, no equipment, nowhere to hide. Tom Holland apparently does it for fun — his PR is 27 rounds, 810 reps, and his actual quote on it is “you don’t have to think about anything, you just count your rounds.” Ask your forearms how they feel about that on round 19. But if you think Cindy is a mean bitch, wait til you meet Karen.
Cindy
AMRAP for 20 minutes
- 5 pull-ups
- 10 push-ups
- 15 air squats
Tom Holland’s PR: 27 rounds (810 reps). Sounds simple. It isn’t.
Karen
For time
- 150 wall balls
- 9/6 kg ball to a 3/2.7 m target
No cleverness required. Just misery, evenly distributed across 150 reps.
Karen doesn’t out-think you. She just outlasts you. Speaking of thinking too much, Fran will make you reconsider your relationship with the barbell entirely.
Fran
21-15-9, for time
- Thrusters (43/29 kg)
- Pull-ups
Shortest workout on this list. Somehow the one people fear most.
Grace is 30 reps of a single lift, done as fast as you can. It looks like nothing on paper. It is not nothing.
Grace
For time
- 30 clean and jerks (61/43 kg)
One movement, thirty reps, all the oxygen in the room.
Diane pairs a heavy deadlift with being upside down, which is CrossFit’s way of asking whether you can multitask while your vision goes spotty.
Diane
21-15-9, for time
- Deadlifts (102/70 kg)
- Handstand push-ups
Heavy pulling, then blood rushing to your head. Great combo.
That’s the famous five. The rest of the list doesn’t get any friendlier.
Angie
For time, in order
- 100 pull-ups
- 100 push-ups
- 100 sit-ups
- 100 air squats
No rounds, no rest between movements. Just four walls of pain, back to back.
Barbara
5 rounds, with 3 minutes’ rest between each
- 20 pull-ups
- 30 push-ups
- 40 sit-ups
- 50 air squats
The rest is the trap. You’ll need every second and it still won’t be enough.
Chelsea
EMOM for 30 minutes
- 5 pull-ups
- 10 push-ups
- 15 air squats
Cindy’s evil twin. Fine for the first 15 minutes. Then the clock becomes the enemy.
Elizabeth
21-15-9, for time
- Cleans (61/43 kg)
- Ring dips
Fran’s cousin, with rings instead of a pull-up bar. Just as unpleasant.
Eva
5 rounds, for time
- 800 m run
- 30 kettlebell swings (32/24 kg)
- 30 pull-ups
A monster. Budget the better part of an hour and your dignity.
Helen
3 rounds, for time
- 400 m run
- 21 kettlebell swings (24/16 kg)
- 12 pull-ups
The classic benchmark. Everyone’s first “fast” time and everyone’s most re-tested WOD.
Isabel
For time
- 30 snatches (61/43 kg)
Grace’s sister, with a snatch instead of a clean and jerk. Technical and unforgiving.
Jackie
For time
- 1000 m row
- 50 thrusters (20 kg)
- 30 pull-ups
Light barbell, heavy consequences. The row alone will humble most people.
Kelly
5 rounds, for time
- 400 m run
- 30 box jumps (61/51 cm)
- 30 wall balls
Long, grindy, unglamorous. The workout equivalent of a Tuesday that won’t end.
Mary
AMRAP for 20 minutes
- 5 handstand push-ups
- 10 pistols, alternating legs
- 15 pull-ups
Gymnastics on both ends and single-leg squats in the middle. Not for beginners.
Nancy
5 rounds, for time
- 400 m run
- 15 overhead squats (43/29 kg)
Sprinting into a barbell over your head, repeatedly. What could go wrong?
Nicole
AMRAP for 20 minutes
- 400 m run
- Max-rep pull-ups
Simple until round three, when your grip quietly files for divorce.
